Making a relationship go the distance can be pretty tough in 2018. There’s a reason most of our grandparents stayed together, and yet we can’t seem to make a relationship work for very long. Maybe the internet and social media have something to do with it – the fact that other people are so accessible.
This doesn’t mean you can’t make your relationship go the distance. You just have to make sure you’re doing what it takes to keep it alive. Read on for some pointers that should help you:
Focusing On The Right Stuff
When you’ve been with somebody for a while, it’s all too easy to focus on the ‘bad’ things. At first, you loved so many things about them, but then those things seem to fade away. They even become annoying in their own right. However, appreciating your partner and forcing yourself to think of the great things will make you feel more grateful and remember why you picked them in the first place.
This doesn’t mean you should ignore anything terrible – a relationship deal breaker, or anything like that. It just means that you should remain mindful and conscious in the relationship, so you’re staying with them out of choice and not out of habit.
Not Looking At Your Relationship As Your Main Source Of Validation
People get into relationships for a variety of different reasons. It’s a shame that people these days seem to be getting into relationships as their main source of validation. This puts far too much pressure on a partner and creates unhealthy boundaries and habits in the long run. You need to work on your self-esteem and ensure you have things going on outside of your partner to make it work. Both parties do.
Learning One Another’s Love Language
It’ll help you to read a book and figure out one another’s love language. Everybody has one or two of five love languages, and if you don’t know your partner’s, you could feel like you’re giving them all the love in the world, but they’re just not feeling it. You could present them with one of the luxury siliconerings.com as a big gesture, and they just won’t feel the way you expect them to if getting gifts isn’t one of their love languages. Some people need quality time, others need touch, others need words of affirmation – read the book and you’ll figure it out!
Communication is an art form, one that is pretty much lost in relationships. Being able to communicate, especially when it comes to things that are bothering you is one of the best things you can learn to do. You shouldn’t be using judgemental, accusatory language, such as ‘you always…’ instead, you should be starting your sentences with ‘I feel like this when…’
Not only will this get a better response from your partner, they are more likely to see your point of view. Don’t let your feelings or emotions take over. Stay calm, don’t shout, and never be passive aggressive with your partner. That is a super toxic way to let them know you are unhappy.