A huge part of being a BAUCE is having a confidence mindset and positive self esteem. Often times, people mistake confidence for arrogance or being the loudest person in the room. However, confidence is so much more than this. It starts from the inside; it starts with a huge belief in oneself which then begins to reflect on the external – how you walk, dress, the relationships you attract, the way you go after your goals etc.
If you struggle with crippling low self esteem and shyness which is affecting your ability to go after their goals, these 10 daily practices will help in turning your confidence levels just a notch up no matter how blah you feel.
A woman who looks good cannot be talked to anyhow. There’s a confidence you have when you look fly especially when you perceive you are the flyest looking in the room. It automatically gives you the boldness and courage to seize opportunities and be courageous. If you look and dress like a BAUCE, you may begin to find yourself making BAUCE moves such as taking charge, being more productive and taking risks. Dress the way you want to be addressed.
“Aromas can enhance your mood and change your behavior,” says Danielle Fleming, a fragrance expert and founder of Note Fragrances. Another study found that 90 percent of women feel more confident while wearing a scent than those who go fragrance-free. We often underestimate the power of smell; what it does to you and those around you. When a woman smells good, it makes her instantly attractive. She has an aura that draws people to her. And when you know you smell good, like really good, you feel more confident to be around people, to grace rooms with your presence and speak up when you are needed.
Stay in touch with your support group
Every girl boss needs a hype squad. It could be your best friend, roommate, mom, boyfriend, coach, mentor; that one person who can give you the reminder of who you are. That one person who you speak too and they push you to do, push you to step outside your comfort zones, remind you that you were born for such a time as this. This circle of friends always helps with a boost of confidence. It could be calling your CEO girlfriend before giving a keynote speech that you are so nervous about; speaking to her would remind you that you deserve to be on that podium; you prepared for moments like this, she will tell you to step up even in the midst of fear. She will remind you to feel the fear and do it anyway. Or moms or grandmothers who may not understand what you do on a daily basis as a content creator or a social media personality, but are there showering you with prayers; sending you blessings and morning affirmations as you are about to take on the day. Community is important. It does take a village and despite the message of being your biggest fan is preached, at the end of the day we as humans seek for affirmation and external validation especially for us as women. We want to feel seen, we want to feel heard and we want to feel understood.
Know your onions
Preparation generally in life brings confidence. For example, if one is preparing for a keynote speech maybe to address a corporation, it may seem daunting and one’s insecurities may begin to resurface. However, the simple and fundamental way to deal with this is to go above and beyond with the preparation. Know your onions. Know your facts. Conduct extensive research and master your topic. Practice your delivery over and over again. When you really know your onions, it helps with nerves and gives you an ounce of confidence because no matter what is thrown at you, you’ll be okay because you know your stuff. The same goes for sitting for an exam; the more prepared you are, the more confident you will be sitting that exam. Knowledge brings confidence. Know your onions ladies. Invest in yourself through books, videos, podcasts in your field. Develop yourself. Position yourself as an expert and watch opportunities come to you. Most importantly, watch your confidence continue to grow. No doubt, you will make mistakes, you may fail sometimes but it’s all part of the preparation. Failures are lessons.
There is immense power that comes from being still, meditating and asking God for guidance and leadership through the day. There is power knowing who you are – God’s daughter and that whatever you ask in His name, it can be yours. You step differently knowing who you are. Spirituality is a grounding force for us as human beings. It provides us with identity and security which helps with our self esteem and confidence. It shows us we are needed and it gives us the validation we so often long for.
Develop your sense of self awareness
Self awareness is a huge fundamental for improving one’s confidence. A good awareness of who you are as a person ranging from your strengths, abilities, weakness, insecurities, traumas makes you better informed at handling whatever life throws at you. Knowing your weaknesses is essential to what you can improve on, and when you are aware of this, there’s nothing you will hear externally that will hurt you because you already know yourself. Knowledge is power. Knowledge brings confidence. Get to know yourself through journaling, therapy, conversations so you can find the confidence to own who you are unapologetically.
Listen to your fave music and/or podcasts
You are what you listen too. Blast your favourite jams. As you are driving to that conference, turn on your favourite music all the way up and vibe to it. It gets you in the right mood. It makes you feel happy. Listen to empowering music reminding you how beautiful, powerful and special you are. Or better still, you can listen to motivational podcasts, interviews or inspiring stories to get you in the right atmosphere for the day. You may not be able to determine how the day goes, but you can determine how you will react and handle whatever the day throws at you. Choose to be happy. Choose confidence. Reject fear. Reject negativity. You have that power.
Walk like a BAUCE
Shoulders straight. Head high. And walk, walk, walk. If you need to listen to the song, Walk by Saucy Santana, DO SO. Carry yourself the way you want to be addressed. Walk like the woman you want to become. Walk like you’ve got a whole load of cash in your bank account. Walk like you have big dreams and goals. It sends off an aura to those around you and gradually these confident moves begin to influence the way you think and approach life.
This is perhaps one of the most common ways to relieve stress and tension. Studies from The Cleveland Clinic affirm that exercising for 20 to 30 minutes every day, picking an activity you enjoy so you’ll stick with it, varying what you do to ward off boredom, and mixing classes, sports and exercise with friends, and individual workouts to keep things interesting, keep pounds off and keep your confidence high. Apart from the fact that it helps one stay healthy and body confident, it is also useful in clearing the mind, calming down nerves, helping one process their thoughts and just brings clarity to the day. For you, it might be taking a morning jog while for others it might be lifting weights at the gym or doing 15 mins on the treadmill. How do you like to stay active? Go for it! If you wake up feeling blah and unmotivated, the solution might be you putting on some comfy clothes and taking a walk or doing a dance tutorial. Do what works for you!
Limit your social media usage
It is hard. For the social media lovers or for the average BAUCE trying to build her personal brand or stay engaged with her online community, it may be difficult to disconnect or take a few hours off social media each day. But it is helpful. Waking up and immediately scrolling through Instagram is generally seen to heighten anxiety, FOMO, comparison and could be an ultimate mood killer for some. But, many of us can’t seem to take a break despite how much we nag about Instagram. So you might be thinking, what on earth is the solution? Set a timer. Bingo! Time yourself for 10 mins to scroll through social media, respond to dm’s and comments, post on your feeds etc, and then get your day started or get back to work. Another helpful strategy is being intentional with how you use social media- who are you following? What are you consuming? The mute,unfollow and block button is always readily available. Guard your heart. Protect your spirit, for out of it flows the issues of life (Proverbs 24:3 KJV). Follow accounts that bring light and positivity into your life. Follow accounts which inspire you to take action on your goals and be a better BAUCE. We can go on and on about social media, ultimately you have the choice on how much power it has on your mental wellbeing. You have the power. You hold the key to the door of your heart. Fiercely protect what you consume.