When Your Man Loves a Man

2down-low-brothers-thumb copyImagine dating who you believe to be the most perfect guy. He’s ambitious, good-looking, and diligent. He gives you affection, flowers, and frequent phone calls through the week. You find yourself loving him and the relationship is blossoming into something great.

Then one night, you’re walking through your home and overhear your man whispering “I love you” over the phone to someone else. Your heart is bouncing in your chest and you decide to wait a few minutes before confronting him. But then you’re shocked when you hear him say, “Bye (insert a male’s name here).”

Every relationship experiences trials, but have you ever heard of a man loving another man while in a relationship with his lady? It is quite surreal to know that there are women out there who are experiencing this and most likely don’t even know it.

An old friend of mine had experienced this exact situation and I can tell it tore her into pieces. Finding out your man, lover, boyfriend of nearly five years sits you down to tell you he loves another man is not the simplest obstacle to get over. She was completely clueless to the fact that he was even seeing another man behind her back. She was blinded by the random dates and gifts he would surprise her with on a daily basis. She was the one who walked through the hall of her apartment and overheard him whispering sweet nothings into the phone. Words he had used on her to him.

My friend became emotionally and possibly mentally unstable. It was very difficult for her to move on to the next man without being skeptical or wary of every guy she was about to date. She had lost trust in males as a whole and became extremely self-conscious. Am I the woman who made him gay? Was he gay all along? Being cheated on by a woman was one thing – but another man seriously messed with her psyche.

Not to mention, the health risks. She was worried about her sexual health after finding out about her man’s “mister”.  If your man loves another man there is a great possibility he has been sexually active with another man. Monogamous partners are less likely to experience STDs or any other sexual diseases that couples that have multiple sex partners do.

My father always told me that lately there are men out there that come off straight but are secretly on the “down-low” and I have to be extremely careful. The bottom line is that we ladies never know if our man loves another man until hard evidence smacks us in the face. If you find out your man may be engaging in a bi-sexual relationship, put your health, mind and heart first. Do not stay in the relationship. Always be honest and remember to love yourself first.



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