Close Menu
    Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram
    Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest
    BAUCE
    SUBSCRIBE
    • Hustle

      The Difference Between a Mentor and an Advisor: Understanding Their Unique Roles

      April 28, 2025

      Leveling Up: How Quality SEO Tools Can Take Your Brand to the Next Level

      April 23, 2025

      How to Network at a Women’s Conference And Build Meaningful Connections for Success

      April 4, 2025

      How to Know It Is Time to Get an Office as an Entrepreneur: 5 Clear Signs You’re Ready to Expand

      April 2, 2025

      Benefits of Adding Telehealth Options as a Med Spa Owner

      March 31, 2025
    • Believe

      How Working From Home May Make Anxiety Worse (And What to Do About It)

      February 27, 2025

      Overcoming Imposter Syndrome: Confidence Tips for Black Women Entrepreneurs

      January 27, 2025

      10 Black Influencers To Follow If You Want to Start A Business in 2025

      January 22, 2025

      How To Use Affirmations To Manifest Abundance and Wealth In Your Life

      January 6, 2025

      The Ultimate Guide to Digital Vision Boards

      January 2, 2025
    • Earn

      How Entrepreneurs Can Prepare for A Recession: Smart Strategies for Tough Economic Times

      April 30, 2025

      How Non-Profit Founders Can Gain Capital and Build Meaningful Partnerships

      April 21, 2025

      Here’s How To Properly File Taxes as a Small Business Owner

      April 7, 2025

      Staying the Course: How Black Women in the Retail Space are Navigating DEI Rollbacks

      March 24, 2025

      20 Funding Programs and Resources Every Black Woman Founder Needs To Know About in 2025

      March 19, 2025
    • Live

      How to Refresh Your Look Without a Major Makeover

      April 23, 2025

      The Art of Hosting Coming-of-Age Events

      April 15, 2025

      Find The Best Women’s Shoe Brands For Work By Focusing on Style and Comfort

      April 9, 2025

      Say Yes to Jewelry That Doesn’t Make Your Skin Flare Up

      April 7, 2025

      Wellness-Oriented Rentals in San Antonio: A New Era of Healthy Living

      March 12, 2025
    • Profiles

      Serial Entrepreneur and TV Star Melody Shari On Adding Beauty To Her Business Empire

      April 7, 2025

      How Danika Berry Turned Adversity Into Success With The Relaunch Of Glam Body

      March 5, 2025

      How ArLancia Williams is Building Generational Wealth Through Real Estate

      March 3, 2025

      How Nina Parker Became A Successful Fashion Brand Owner

      February 5, 2025

      Candi Dailey Bridges Hope and Hospitality

      January 20, 2025
    • More
      • About
      • Contact
      • Jobs
      • Advertise
    • Shop
    BAUCE
    Love

    The Advice You Need Before Rekindling A Relationship With Your Ex

    By Kiersten BrownNovember 15, 20237 Mins Read
    Source: Getty Images
    Share
    Facebook Twitter LinkedIn Pinterest Email

    The fall season brings more than just cooler weather and pumpkin spice lattes; it also brings nostalgia for past relationships. Suddenly, after the end of a long day, you’re thinking about cuddling up with your ex on the sofa watching a movie. 

    The yearning for companionship in the era of swiping and catfishing is understandable. Wanting to rekindle an old flame is something many single people revisit after a significant breakup. However, the biggest question that lingers in the lonely air is, is it a good idea?

    If you’ve been sending flirty texts to your ex or looking through old pictures, the idea of getting back with your ex has probably been on top of your mind. To help you decide to try again or walk away for good, here is relationship advice from experts and everyday people to help you make the decision. 

    Is it a bad idea to try to get back with an ex?

    To answer the question, is it a bad idea to get back with your ex, the response might change depending on who you ask. Your best friends might say yes, and your mother might say give him another chance, but what’s important is how you come to an answer that is right for you. Here are some things to consider.

    Take an honest reflection of the past.

    Consider why you and your ex parted ways in the first place. Was it because of something that’s no longer an issue, such as living in separate states? Were you not communicating enough? Ask yourself, was trust broken, and can that trust be rebuilt? Relationships aren’t black and white. You need to ask yourself if the problems of the past will continue to be problems in the future.

    Are you or your ex the same as before?

    Personal growth is not just crucial for one’s self but for relationships as well. During your time broken up, how have you grown as a person? Have you become more patient? Do you now have more of a work-life balance? Does your partner show maturity of emotional growth? Consider if the person you are now is ready to get back into a relationship with the current version of your ex.

    Do you miss them?

    Sometimes, wanting to get back with your ex results from you simply missing them. Perhaps they were the one person who could always make you laugh. Maybe they are a great listener, or you share the same weird hobbies. Either way, it’s essential to consider whether the feelings you are having are romantic or not. Perhaps you can work on building a friendship rather than a new relationship.

    What do experts say about getting back with your ex?

    You’ve probably questioned your best friends about whether you should get back with your ex, but what about some professional advice? According to a survey by eharmony, getting back with an ex is common amongst adults, especially millennials. Their data showed that 6 in 10 adults have rekindled an old flame. 

    Why is this so common? The relationship experts at eHarmony, Minaa B and Laurel House, shared their perspectives. 

    “One reason someone might choose to get back together with an ex-partner may be because the familiarity and comfort of the past relationship is more appealing than the uncertainty of starting a new relationship with someone else,” shares Minaa B. “Others may feel the need to reconcile with their ex to regain a sense of control and power in the relationship.”

    It seems that this idea of familiarity draws couples back together. “There’s comfort with an ex,” shares Laurel House. “They know you. They may have seen and experienced the good and the bad of you. They understand your lifestyle and likes as well as dislikes and quirks. It feels easy to fold back into each other.”

    House also mentioned that for singles, the idea of entering a new relationship with an ex can be more appealing than entering a brand-new relationship with someone new. 

    All in all, this expert advice shows you there is no shame in wanting to return to a relationship with your ex. The most crucial factor is that you enter that relationship with open communication, understanding, and a few other tools to help you make the partnership better.  If you’ve realized that getting back with your ex may lead to long-term happiness, here are some things to consider as you get back into the relationship saddle. 

    Take things slow

    You might be feeling giddy and happy to have someone to cuddle up with on a Friday night, but the critical thing to remember is to take things slow. It might feel counterintuitive, but it’s helpful to move slowly to see if the relationship is viable or not. 

    Taking things slowly can look like going on actual dates, limiting how much time you spend the night at each other’s places. It can also be sitting down and having a serious conversation about what you both expect from the relationship the second time around. 

    Address old issues

    An advantage of taking things slow is that it gives you time to address old issues. Take the time to discuss not only why you broke up but also what led to the breakup. Try to get to the core of your relationship problems. For instance, if your partner was putting more time into work than into the relationship, what has changed? Has your partner decided to work fewer hours, or do they have a highly demanding job that doesn’t allow much leisure time?

    When you bring up old issues, be mindful not to play the blame game. Instead, approach old issues as wanting to find solutions rather than bringing up old problems. 

    Start from a blank slate

    Once you’ve addressed and resolved your old issues, it’s essential to start from a blank page. Meaning you want to start the relationship without any expectations or assumptions. 

    It’s okay to have hopes and dreams for the relationships, but be open to things turning out differently than you wanted. Different doesn’t always mean bad. 

    Try them on for size

    Even though getting back with an ex feels familiar, it’s okay to have a test run before committing fully.  A trial period can help to work out any issues you have that are unresolved.  Setting the parameters of the trial period can be something you and your partner develop together. Perhaps you want to give yourself three months of being in the relationship and then decide to have a check-in afterward to see if it’s a good idea to continue. 

    Consult with a therapist

    Sometimes, you need the help of a third-party professional to help you clean up some of the areas of your relationship you may have overlooked. Working with a therapist can also help you to better communicate with your partner and make sure that both sides feel seen and heard.

    Notice bad habits before they turn into a problem

    Wanting the relationship to work is understandable. However, overlooking specific problems is not going to make things better in the long wrong. If you start noticing yourself slipping back into old habits, such as being quick to judge or not supporting your partner, have a way to break or change those habits. 

    Remember that the beginning of a relationship is building the foundation of your partnership. Communicating and setting boundaries in the beginning will help you create a lasting future with your ex.

    Share. Facebook Twitter Pinterest LinkedIn Tumblr Email Reddit WhatsApp
    Kiersten Brown
    • Website
    • Instagram

    Kiersten Brown is a Travel Coach whose mission is to help women of color create their dream life by living in their dream country. You can get her free guide to living abroad here. Or follow her adventures on Instagram @kikimarieb15.

    Related Posts

    Getting Back on the Horse

    October 10, 2023

    Couples in Care: What You Need to Consider

    July 5, 2023

    Get Ready to Shine Bright: Find Your Perfect Engagement Ring Here

    April 25, 2023
    Add A Comment
    Leave A Reply Cancel Reply

    TOP RESOURCES FOR YOU

    15 Black Women Web Designers That Can Transform Your Website

    How To Truly Break The Cycle of Debt

    It’s Time To Stop Sleeping On Your Credit Score, Sis – Here’s Why

    These Are 15 of the Highest Paying Careers To Pursue

    15 Good Jobs That Women Can Do From Anywhere Without Experience

    Facebook X (Twitter) Instagram Pinterest
    • Advertise
    • Privacy Policy
    • Contact
    • Jobs
    • Subscribe
    © 2025 BAUCE MEDIA LLC

    Type above and press Enter to search. Press Esc to cancel.

    x