Don’t Be A Hater, Sis: There’s Room At The Top For All Of Us

Black women standing together

Don’t compare where you are in life to everyone else out there. Your time is coming — just wait on it.

Ever feel like there’s something you’d REALLY like to get into but there’s already someone else killing the game? Don’t make the mistake of talking yourself out of your own dreams and settling for something less than because you feel inadequate compared to who is out there. Yes, there are people succeeding and seemingly dominating an industry you’ve been dreaming about being apart of for years now. It’s time to kill the comparison and get out of thinking that we aren’t as “whatever” enough to make it to the top.

You ain’t for everybody and everybody ain’t for you.

Let’s think about the line-up of a talk show for a second. The hosts normally differ in race, gender, and political views. They’re designed this way because producers understand that though the show may fit for a particular audience, everyone may not resonate with EVERY host.

What does this have to do with you? Well, the same concept stands for you, me, and everyone else who wants to do something similar to the girl sitting next to us in our broadcast journalism class. Just because we want to pursue the same goal, doesn’t count one of us out because we aren’t identical to a “standard” of an industry.

We all have our own preferences for everything we consume. Food, TV, music, etc. And don’t for a second think that just because you aren’t getting the same exposure, attention, or applause as someone else, doesn’t mean that you aren’t qualified for pursuing your own dreams.

You may bring forth a unique approach, perspective, or visual that someone else really resonates with. And let’s be clear, being unique, is just being yourself. You may be someone’s complete package and another person’s “eh”, but there’s still enough space and attention for you to be just as great as the next BAUCE because of what YOU bring to the table.

We can and should help one another.

Truth is, you need me and I need you. We’re all either getting started, been doing it for a couple of years or have become straight vets at something. And there’s so much that we can learn from one another if we seek out help and guidance. If I wanted to learn how to get into the fashion industry, I’d surely consult with someone who has experience and knowledge about it exclusively.

However, helping one another doesn’t have to stop with handing out advice and knowledge. Collaborating with other people in your industry gives everyone access to exposure to a new crowd, credibility, and of course… those coins. Everyone wins, and there’s no fuss about it.

Collaborations are important in industries because it shows how versatile two unique individuals can be even within the same industry. Think about music, fashion, book, and business collaborations that brought attention to some pretty important or just plain fun things. I’m sure no one was complaining about the impact that was made during big moments like Beyonce and Nicki Minaj’s “I’m Feeling Myself” or Issa Rae’s clever collabos with music stars like SZA and Jasmine Sullivan for her hit HBO show “Insecure”.

In fact, Issa Rae said it best in a recent interview with Roland Martin: “It’s really about networking across…those are the people that you need to build with.”

Even though there are a lot of proclaimed best rappers, it still never stops your neighbor from down the road from thinking he can be the next best thing. He could be the next big thing – which is why we have to be willing to give each person a chance.

Your time is coming — just wait on it. 

Through recent observation, I’ve noticed that a lot of “overnight success” stories actually occurred after QUITE a few years of hustling, pushing, and working hard towards the ultimate goal that we all get to see.

I get it, you may feel as if you’ve been doing the same thing over and over and your dreams haven’t magically come true just yet. You’re on the fence on whether or not you should give up because “Who really cares about little ol’ me anyways?”

Well…. First, you need to ditch that thinking. And secondly, it hasn’t happened yet because it isn’t YOUR time yet. You will hear this a million times but consistency is KEY.

Rushing things or giving up too early easily leads to failure, but a consistent pursuit laced with hard work will get you where you want to be, but only when the time is right. It’s easy to say trust the timing….but seriously, trust it. Your time will come just like everyone else’s. I promise there’s room for ya!

Try following these steps the next time you feel like you’ve missed your shot in a particular industry:

  • Only compete with yourself. Do not get caught up with what the woman next to you is doing.
  • Don’t find your validation in society’s approval, continue your pursuit authentically.
  • Focus on what you can do, not what you can’t. Then try to do what you think you can’t after you’ve accepted what you have.
  • Rather than compare, congratulate and collaborate. Lifting other people up positively will only bring good vibes your way.
  • Remember, what you offer matters to someone. You just have to find who that “someone” is.
Featured Image via @createdbyjarrod

Click to comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

BAUCE is a lifestyle site for self-made women. We create and curate content that helps ambitious women from multicultural backgrounds build their empires, achieve financial freedom, and look good while doing it. We’re not just a publication. Being a BAUCE is a lifestyle.


To Top