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My Guy Friend Told Me I Didn’t Know What I Was Doing With My Natural Hair

Life should be a symbolic representation of change and progress. Last year I decided to do just that, by switching things up and navigating my look in a different direction (for the better of course) and put my hair through a 360-degree transformation.

This came after the realization that the creamy crack was not holding me down anymore, and my hair was at it’s worst (health wise). It was “bye-bye” to the days where I had ‘Bey’ length hair and made onlookers do a double-take, wondering if all that hair was really all mine.  Unfortunately, I had become a victim of hair dyes and tight extensions thinking I was the baddest chick in Brooklyn with significantly long hair. But to my dismay, stagnation and split ends changed my hair’s beauty and I was left to figure out ways to make my hair appear longer and thicker (hence the extensions). The situation was hopeless but I wasn’t quite ready to do anything drastic yet. I heard about girls chopping their hair or growing out the processed strands and starting anew, but my stubborn mindset was only running by one motto: “live by the crack, die by the crack.”

It’s funny how things work out though.

I remember having a real one-on-one conversation with one of my guy friends who helped me realize that I truly did not know what my real, natural hair looked or felt like. Sure, I had an idea because there was a time in my childhood where the only products that touched my hair were Shea butter and coconut oil. The pressure to “fit in” with my hair never mattered. It was after this discussion that I made the choice to do things differently and decide to go natural.

After transitioning for about 4-5 months with box braids and cute protective styles, I hit a fork in the road. I was dealing with two textures and just couldn’t take the maintenance anymore. Last August was a pivotal moment in my transition. I grabbed a pair of my mom’s styling scissors and starting chopping off my hair, section-by-section, right by the line of demarcation where my relaxed hair ended and my curly hair began. I felt so in-tune with my hair and it was a bit emotional. At the same time, I felt as though I was (symbolically) getting rid of the baggage in my life (i.e., ending a long relationship that wasn’t working anymore) and this was my moment to start fresh with a new canvas of beauty.

A few days after the big chop, I became nervous and started to reconsider my decision. I mean my hair was at the shortest it has ever been and I had no idea of what to do with it. To my fortune, the hair movement was live on Youtube and I found myself religiously going through videos and forums about taking care of curls, learning new styles for my TWA and finding motivation through encouragement from sistas who had been there and done that (with a lot of growth to show for it).

Now is my time to give back to the conversation that has helped me become versatile with my hair and appreciate what my roots are made of. The Bauce Life is a platform where I can happily share my experience and the experience of others who are embarking on new journeys of their own.

Thank you Bauce Mag for the opportunity and I look forward to the creativity that is yet to come!

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