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Be A BAUCE: Why You Don’t Have To Turn Down For Anyone

Kenya Moore Bravo gif

Girl, you better be gone with the wind fabulous.

For years black women have gotten a name of being a “mad black woman” when we spoke in authority and demanded what we wanted in business, relationships, and other aspects of our lives. Also when women aren’t traditional in relationships or their dating life, we are called everything but our given name. We live in a society today where women, especially black women are setting the bar for the liberated, non-traditional woman. From women like Teyana Taylor to Yara Shahidi, black women are no longer “being seen and not heard” and stepping to the forefront of music, media, and especially relationships.

So how can we maintain healthy relationships while staying our empowered selves? How do we keep ourselves from being low balled in the business industry? Below are some tips for staying true to yourself in a society that’s constantly trying to tone us down.

Always speak up for yourself

As women, a lot of times we aren’t heard or even respected when we simply speak. A lot of men have a mentality that we don’t know what we’re talking about especially if they believe they are fluent in that particular subject. So when you aren’t happy, you don’t agree with something, or strongly believe you are correct about something, speak up! Let your partner know something is wrong. In the dating scene, being able to speak up for yourself and knowing what you will and will not take into a relationship is mandatory. You are in control of who and what you allow in your space, don’t compromise yourself. This works in the workplace as well. Once you start speaking up for yourself and standing by what you say, it’s going to be hard to knock you down.

Get’cha money sis!

Now we know for years women have been low balled when it comes to salaries, pay rates and other income benefits. But there’s always been an unspoken issue with black women and their income rates. From women who work in sales to women who are actors or entrepreneurs, it seems as though we get the lowest offer. Many of us weren’t taught to demand more or ask for more so we usually take what was offered and they’ve gotten comfortable with giving us the bare minimum. Women like Monique have spoken up about this issue with her recent disagreement with Netflix. Unfortunately, we as black women have to demand more than the bare minimum that they offer. It’s a long fight but it’s one that needs to happen for not just our pockets, but for our respect.

It’s your body, do what you want

Sexual liberation seems to be one of those topics that are never going to be ‘okay’ in our community. Sexual liberation is basically being a woman and enjoying sex without being so conservative about it. So as a woman, we should be able to do what we want with our bodies whether it’s staying to ourselves until marriage, not doing it at all, or wisely choosing who we decide to have intercourse with…it’s YOUR body. You and you only can give consent to your body.

Live in your truth

The last and more important piece of advice, live your life for you.. live in your truth. You know what you want, what you deserve, and what you are worth. You set the standard for yourself, demand that respect, and go after everything you want. As long as you are living for you and you are being genuine, that’s the what matters the most. You have to get what you want; with respect in a relationship, better income opportunities, and speaking your mind on social issues.

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