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Conditions of The Main Squeeze

By Sabrina Smith

It’s always a beautiful thing when a woman finds the perfect man to be with. I just recently watched the movie, Jumping the Broom, which was about an African-American lawyer who promised God that she would remain celibate until she found the guy that she was going to marry. Luckily, she did and after six months they “jumped the broom.” Sometimes a relationship is just like how it is in the movies, but if a lady wants to keep her man and her relationship, she’s going to have to do more than show affection (especially if she’s not giving up the goods).

1.)  Men love food: They say that the best way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. If you’re anything like me, this option of keeping your man happy might scare you because you never learned how to make a dish. No matter how hard you try not to, in the end you’re going to have to pick up some culinary skills. Even if you plan to be with a so-called chef, he’s not going to want to cook everyday. The New Elegant Black Woman has an informative segment about black women learning how to cook the right way.

2.)  Get rid of the negativity: Women (especially black women) have a tendency to pick up on bad habits when it comes to the man. It’s a bad habit for a reason and you have to find a way to deal with those nuances because the more you complain, the more he’s going to want to go astray.

3.)  Jealousy is not key: I find it very interesting that a woman sees no problem in having male friends, but the minute her guy is texting another lady, whether it be for work or for social reasons, there this immediate jealousy reaction. Personally, I believe if a guy has pledged to be with me, then he has no intention of having relations with someone else. That’s the mindset that women need to hold on to if she wants to keep things smooth (and even in the event that he does trip up, that would be his loss).

4.)  Shop for your man: Men like the fact that we consider them. I work in retail and from time-to-time I would pick up shirts or boxers for the guy that I’m talking to, and he really appreciates it. Even better, he goes out of his way to do things for me and the reciprocation is lovely.

5.)  Have a relationship, not a contractual agreement: Some men (through my observations) feel that being in relationship is like being tied down, and he should never have to feel that way. I think it might have to do with the fact that woman expect their man to be a certain way (and therefore behave in a way that the woman wants them to behave). If you really see yourself being with your man for a long time, you have to make him really feel the idea of staying in a relationship. Don’t lock him up with those terms and conditions because there’s always another lady waiting for your relationship to end.

Take some time to check out B International. The couple behind the site gives great tips to keeping a great relationship.

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