Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
In men, the sense of sight plays a very important role in arousal. Want to test it out and make him want you? Here are some ideas:
1- Install ambient lighting
Install ambient lighting in the living room or bedroom: it should be dimmed and in a warm colour like orangey yellow. You could even go with a red bulb but beware as that is a bit prostitute-y. Don’t go for blue or green, they’re too cold and therefore not likely to heighten arousal.
2- Invest in candles
Invest in candles. They create a halo of light that’s particularly flattering and contributes to intimacy. If the candle is on the table between you and it’s dark around you, you’ll feel closer together in the same circle of light.
3- Choose hot colours
Choose hot colours for your bedroom, as well as ethnic, shimmering and shiny fabrics. Furniture, curtains, rugs… Boys like the “minimalist” style and a metallic and cold modern look, but it’s not very erotic and they want you to be a bit girlie! Still avoid an overload of pink – no-one needs to be that girlie!
4- Dress to impress
Dress to impress! Men are governed by their eyes and like a bull reacting to the colour red, they react to the way a woman looks. Wear soft, tactile, warm-coloured clothing that’s sexy and suggestive without being vulgar, and definitely choose clothes that show off your best bits. Less isn’t necessarily more when it comes to seduction – leave something to the imagination.
5- Apply make-up
Apply make-up: lipstick in particular is believed by ethnologists to have erotic properties: it tends to represent the swelling of the labia minora which go red when aroused.
6- Be suggestive
Be suggestive: while the sense of sight is erogenous, showing off too much skin isn’t necessarily sexy. When choosing your clothes, don’t go too far: a suggestive neckline which leaves something to the imagination is often more erotic than a completely transparent shirt! Buttons and zips can be exciting too but leave the unbuttoning for later.
7- Make erotic movements
Make erotic movements: the sense of sight doesn’t just concern motionless aspects, it also captures movements. Certain movements are very stimulating with the right atmosphere: licking your lips, crossing your legs, caressing your thigh with a hand or suggestively biting your bottom lip…
8- Move a mirror into your bedroom for one night
Place a mirror in your bedroom. Seeing yourself in the throes of passion can be a real turn-on. But don’t leave it there. Feng Shui rules say that mirrors introduce a third person into your relationship!
Music to his ears
After sight, hearing is the second sense that counts. It plays a major role in creating an ambience. If you want to make him fall in love with you, act on this sense!
9- Choose ambient music
Choose music based on your own personal tastes if you don’t know him that well, or based on his tastes which will make him putty in your hands! Think sexy background music. The focus should be on you and not the thrash metal.
10- Read aloud
Reading aloud from a book or, if you’ve bagged yourself a sensitive type, a poem can be sexy. It all depends on how you read it. If you’re trying too hard to be sexy, you’ve already ruined it.
11- Read an erotic story together
Read an erotic story together that you’ve chosen. This source of stimulation will pass from his ears to his brain and will turn out to be very arousing. Women get really turned on by erotic literature too so you’ll both benefit.
12- Speak with your romantic voice
Having a slightly different way of speaking to your man is a good way of putting him in the mood without being to obvious. Just switching subtley from normal speech to bedroom speech should get the juices flowing.
13- Use innuendo when talking to him
Use innuendo and double entendres when talking to him. It’s cheeky and it’ll make him grin.
Indulge his sense of taste and smell
The senses of taste and smell are the most primitive and their sensors are located at the centre of the bra
in where the archaic brain is located.
This is why they are important in the animal aspect ofsexuality, an aspect that can be very beautiful when it’s linked to feelings and spirituality. Learn how to stimulate these senses to make him fall in love with you.
14- Prepare an aphrodisiac meal
Prepare an aphrodisiac meal. Read our A-Z of aphrodisiac foods to give you some ideas.
15- Suggest he breathes in your favourite smell
Suggest he breathes in your favourite smell – if you love the smell of a perfume or a flower, when you come across it, breathe it in yourself then casually say “I love this smell, come and smell it…”
16- Spray an amber perfume in the air
Spray a warm and sweet amber perfume in the air such as Shalimar, Mitsouko, or some amber or vanilla extract. Otherwise, light up some incense with an erotic scent. Amber is a sexy scent.
17- Get him out in the garden
Get him out in the garden or on a walk on a evening. The smells of the seasons can have a huge effect on wellbeing and closeness.
18- Add fragrance to your linen
Add fragrance to your linen by sliding some lavender sachets in your bed sheets for example.
19- Get him to splash some scent
Give him a bottle of eau de toilette to splash himself with. This will make you want to get your nose closer to his skin.
Encourage body contact
Everyone can be seen, heard, smelled (if wearing a fragrance) at a distance by a stranger but not everyone lets themselves be touched! So make the most of your intimacy to take things a bit further. Here are some tips to make him want you soooo bad!
20- Touch him like you’re doing it involuntarily
Touch him like you’re doing it involuntarily. Stay close to him, a bit too close even, in his intimate personal space. This is because under 50cm, we only normally let people who are extremely close to us get near. Put your hand on his arm when talking to him, tidy a section of his hair, brush off a (false) crumb on his shirt, etc.
21- Play footsie under the table
Play footsie with him under the table! It’s a classic but it works. You can even caress him lightly under the table, passing your hand up his thigh…
22- In a crowd, squeeze up against him
In a crowd (queuing for the cinema, at a gig), squeeze up against him as if you’re being pushed. He won’t know if you’re doing it deliberately or not, and the doubt will be a turn-on.
23- Invite him to do some sport with you
Invite him to do some exercise with you: jogging, swimming… When you sweat together, the communion of bodies isn’t faraway. Avoid however if him and sport don’t really go together!
24- Caress your skin in front of him
Caress your skin in front of him: your arms, your cheek, with a finger, with a bit of hair, as if you find it very soft… It will make him want to touch your skin as well.
25- Speak to him closely, next to his ear
Speak to him closely, just next to his ear so he can feel the warmth of your breath, or even your mouth on his neck. As if you’re whispering a secret to him.
26- Choose soft sheets for your bed
Choose soft and shiny satin or silk sheets for your bed. Scented sheets will also add to the levels of passion.
27- Offer him a body massage
Offer him a body massage: nothing feels better than being pampered. If he’s hurting somewhere, use it to your advantage! His back, knee, ankle… if your hands are able to make him feel better, he’ll be imagining what else you’re capable of.
Anticipating pleasure is a pleasure in itself. That’s why, along with surprising him, it’s also nice to let him know what’s in store.To make a man want you and create an erotic atmosphere, it’s sometimes necessary to make preparations.
28- On the phone, tell him what you’re going to do
On the phone, tell him everything you want to do to him this evening, this weekend or during your next holiday. That will charge the atmosphere with electricity!
29- Write him a love letter
Cheesy, yep. But a love letter with an erotic edge can be a massive turn on.
30- Organise romantic meet-ups
Organise romantic meet-ups. Improvising is great of course but planning can be too. There’s no reason why you can’t enjoy both! For example: set aside a day for the two of you to spend in bed together when nothing, absolutely nothing else is planned.
Exchange and share
To make him want you, create an erotic ambience and get him to get involved. Don’t be the only active one, get him started too.
31- Have fun listening out for sexual overtones
Have fun listening out for sexual overtones whenever he says something.
32- Put the world to rights
Put the world to rights by talking about intellectual subjects. Philosophising and feeling intelligent together can also be very erotic!
33- Laugh together
Have a laugh together, tell him some funny stories, see a comedian, watch a comedy at the cinema. Laughing means breaking down barriers which paves the way well for more erotic pleasures.
34- Adapt to your man
Adapt to your man. They’re not all built the same. Some might feel like sex after a heated discussion about politics, another might love stockings, even under jeans, while another might like women who have just been working out and are all sweaty!
35- Remind him of your shared memories
Reminisce about the things you’ve done together and recall your shared experiences whether cute or cheeky! But don’t tell him about past sexual encounters unless he specifically likes that sort of thing. Most men hate the idea of you with someone else.